Monday, January 23, 2012


Alhamdulillah, someone finally come to assist. One of my reader Miss.HH had been kind enough to offer her 'grammar checking service' for my novel. She's the first to have read the entire draft from Chapter 1 - 7. Recently another reader 'Siti' also offered to help. It helps to have a few person giving their opinion now and then.

Anyway, I also desperately need a Penangite to help me out with geographical information on Penang. So if any Penangites amongst my readers with years of experience living in Penang and has also been to Jerejak Island. Please contact me at

If you're not from Penang but wish to participate, then behold! I also in need of someone with free time to google the internet for pictures. Following the comment by my fellow blogger 'Pengikut Nabi Muhammad', I will adopt the same style of displaying pictures alongside the story. Those who had followed all my 2011's articles would be familiar with my style and understand what I'm looking for.

Anyone interested?

Participants shall have no pay (Yes kesian la, but consider this a charity effort) because the Novel will be available for FREE in the internet, but shall definitely be credited accordingly.

P/S: No PKR / DAP / PAS supporter is allowed to participate. I don't need saboteur and I know how to identify one.

Author: AfterDark
Proof Reader: Miss. HH & Cik Siti

Fatimah Binti Abdul Rahman.

Born on 27th March 1975 to a devout Muslim parents. Her parents were both Malay. At the age of 35, she died and went to Hell. As much as I hate to give such verdict on her, which I’m sure would be offensive to all my non-Muslim readers, I have no doubt about where her final destination would be.

Miss Pang had agreed to grant full access about Fatimah and how Fatimah led her secret life. However, Miss Pang did not release any information on GFA’s role and its funded missionaries for Fatima’s conversion into Christianity. The day Miss Pang went to see me, I was given a 4GB thumb-drive containing piles of scanned documents, all compressed in DJVU format. Everything was there for me to peruse, from her birth certificates, to her school co-curriculum certificates and her baptism certificate. There were pictures of her childhood years with her family, a picture of her wearing head-scarf (tudung) with her friends at school, pictures of her with her boyfriend who wass responsible for her conversion and there’re even pictures of her celebrating Christmas – smiling and waiving bible.

These records were awesome. I had to salute to Ms.Pang and her group for their effort in collecting and compiling these documents. The first time I scrolled through these documents, my jaw dropped in amazement. I couldn’t even believe my eyes when I opened a folder containing all video clips of Fatimah and her boyfriend. There were approximately 120 short videos in there, all in 3GP format and all of them were taken by the boyfriend – I suspected via handpone.

I spent approximately 220 minutes watching it all at home. There were 114 video clips of her ‘normal’ life – at work, at home, shopping, vacationing, at church, etc. Then there were 6 raunchy clips of her sex life being taped by her pervert boyfriend – yes, the kinky boyfriend was holding his Nokia N95 while getting some ‘doggy’ and a ‘pussy’. Thumbs up for Nokia and its Carl Zeis technology! I bought a new Nokia after seeing these videos. Not because I wanted to record my own porn but I had to test the lens for myself.

These ‘porn’ collections made me aware that all these records were most likely obtained without Fatimah’s knowledge. I mean, there’s no way in hell any girl would surrender six home-produced porn starring herself no matter how committed she was to her church. There was also evidence of some documents obtained in a clandestine manner, for example, some of Fatimah’s school certificates were actually photographed by camera (thumbs up again for 5 megapixels Nokia lens!).

If I have to guess, I would say all these documents and pictures were secretly Xeroxed and picture taken by Fatimah’s boyfriend and then given to their church. He’s the only one with the access to these records.

Now, why would a guy like that did something like this to his girlfriend? Despite what I’had seen on television about Catholic church’s confessions, I was pretty sure no church would insist on documenting evidence in order for Sacrament of Penance to take place.

If you asked me, this practice of keeping a person’s ignominy seemed to tally with the Jesuits, the Illuminati, The Freemasons, the Mormons, the Skulls and Bones, the Aum Shinrikyo (Japan), the Scientology, the Order of the Solar Temple, The Heavens Gate, the Parti Keadilan Rakyat and all other cult-like society and organization which have existed throughout history. The whole purpose is to control its members and retain loyalty by force if necessary, not to mention how useful the information would be for profiling purposes.

Amongst these pile of documents, a few helped shed a light on what Fatimah’s story might be. Amidst Fatimah’s possessions I found 9 newspaper clippings of Lina Joy’s case and a draft of her hand-written letter supporting Lina Joy. She was clearly a huge fan of Miss Joy.

I sensed her desperation to throw the moral support on Lina Joy. Heck, she even signed the letter with her own real name. Whether she did mail this letter to any newspaper, it still remained a question. I tried googling the Internet looking for the letter if it was ever posted or referred to by any blogs or Internet forum, unfortunately there was none. Maybe she chickened out at the last moment or maybe something or someone had stopped her.

(In case you have been living outside Malaysia for a few decades and haven’t heard about Lina Joy’s case, Lina Joy is a Malay apostate who in 1998 applied to have her conversion legally recognized by the Malaysian Courts. Born Azlina Binti Jailani in 1964, she filed suit with the High Court in 1999, bypassing the Syariah Court to have her religion as stated in her MyKad changed from Islam to Christian. She later filed suit with the Federal Court in 2006 and in a majority verdict delivered on May 30, 2007 where the Federal Court rejected her appeal).

I was able to figure out her story simply by perusing the entire content of that 4GB pen drive. Fatimah had done me a favour by telling her life story through her belongings. As a profiler, it’s up to me to figure it out by putting together bits and pieces here and there.

As it turned out, Fatimah was no ordinary girl. At school she was this brilliant science stream student, scoring 6As for her SPM . She then attended a local university in Penang (can you guess where?) to study Computer Science. In her 3rd year of faculty, she met and fell in love with a fellow Malay student. One stupid thing (having sex) led to another (of not wearing condom), she ended up being pregnant. If that’s not bad enough to begin with, the couple ended up doing another foolish thing – paying a few hundred Ringgit to a cheap clinic to perform illegal abortion.

Abortion, especially one which was performed beyond the second trimester, is dangerous. Immediate complications which can occur include severe bleeding, uterine perforation, tearing of the cervix, severe damage to the genitals and abdomen, internal infection of the abdomen and blood poisoning. In the case of young Fatimah, the abortion was performed a few days before her final semester exam and destiny made her pay for the price of her sin whereby she fainted in the examination hall just before the exam started. To complete the humiliation, the whole crowd in the hall witnessed her skirt drenched wet in blood especially from between her legs. She definitely earned as the main gossip of the day and some students somehow managed to figure out what had caused the bleeding.

By the time she woke up, it was too late to make up any story. The bleeding was so bad that the university had to send her to a hospital and the doctors simply had to glance to make a correct diagnosis of her condition. Fatimah's precipitated fall from grace was then unavoidable.

To cut the story short, her Malay boyfriend also never made it through the entire exam. He left the dormitory that day and never returned to the university. There were rumours that some fourth-year seniors had decided to pay him a visit that night and forced him to confess the truth for humiliating the faculty. It’s unknown whether the university had ever tried to contact the boyfriend’s parents.

As for Fatimah, her mother was by her side in the hospital ward but her father had disowned her. Her father agreed to pay for the medical bills but refused to see his daughter, let alone letting her return home. Fortunately for Fatimah, a mother’s love has no limits, so her mother stayed behind for two weeks helping her with her situation in Penang. Since Fatimah had missed her entire exam, then by default she had failed and had to repeat the whole semester. Unfortunately for her, her father did not want to pay for her education fees. So the best her mother could do was to use her own savings to help Fatimah find a decent place to stay whilst trying to persuade her husband to forgive their daughter.

After two weeks of bed ridden, Fatimah was well enough to be on her own. Her mother went back to the village to persuade Fatimah’s father. Fatimah on the other hand tried to find a decent job to support herself. This is how she met her boyfriend Robert.

For me, Fatimah’s story is a mix of Lina Joy and Sufiah Yusof blended together. From what I heard, Lina Joy abandoned Islam not because she thinks Christian is where the salvation is, but as a way to retaliate against her parents. I don’t know whether this is true, but there’s a story about her being caught having sex out of wedlock and suffered a domestic fallout with her family soon after that incident. Her family and the community scolded and shunned her. Perhaps, not knowing and fully comprehend the reason behind their anger and resentment, she went to her boyfriend and later embraced his religion.

Sufiah Yusof on the other hand, was a Malaysian prodigy child who went to Oxford University at the age of 13 to learn mathematics. She hated her childhood and her father. In 2000, she rebelled and ran away from Oxford. Two weeks later, she was found in Bournemouth but refused to be reunited with her parents. A bitter email to them followed, describing her childhood as a "living hell". Estranged from her family, she later in life adopted the working name of Shilpa Lee and became a prostitute for £130 per session.

Whenever I think about these girls who are destroying(or have destroyed) their lives, I cannot help but to remember this story of another girl by the name of Jurmayani, allegedly committed suicide in central Java in the 90’s. A friend (Imam Ali as a matter of fact) in the Watchers Group, told me a sad story which had some supernatural elements and also lessons to be learned from this account.

According to Imam, when he was studying in Indonesia his mentor sent him to a house allegedly haunted by a spirit of a 17-year-old girl who committed suicide. So he went, and not only did he have a conversation with the dead girl, she even allowed him to share her feeling from the moment she decided to step to the ledge of the four storey building, to the second she died . Ever since that day, Imam has been telling the story repeatedly as part of his lecture on the topic of “the devil’s final deception”.

I’ll explain in another chapter what “the final deception” is. For now, all my readers need to know the advantages Imam had gained from talking to this dead girl and also the real reason why some people committed suicide followed by their utmost regrets.

On contrary to what some people might believe, those who committed suicide were not because they had lost all hope. It is most likely caused by grief and anger. When Jurmayani was standing on that ledge, her ultimate desire was to make her parents regret for scolding her that entire month. You see, like Lina Joy, Jurmayani was caught with her boyfriend with both their pants down. The fallout that followed was severe. The boyfriend whom she was in love with, had refused to marry her. Instead, his wealthy parents told everyone that Jurmayani was a slut that had slept with several men. Those men were paid to give false statements to support the lies. Jurmayani was heartbroken and devastated since her entire family refused to speak with her, treated her as though she did not exist.

The humiliation and stigma suffered by her family went on for the whole month. Finally, on the day she committed suicide, she was slapped by her dad when she asked the permission to go out to the nearby store to buy a magazine. Her dad made a mistake by calling her a ‘whore’.

Like I said before, grief and anger are usually, if not the cause of suicide. When Jurmayani stepped to the ledge, she was not thinking about the boy or even her lost love. She was actually plotting against her parents. The biggest grief in the world is when one starts thinking that he/she is no longer loved by those he/she desperately needs love from. Jurmayani was convinced that her parents did not love and want her. So she was all out for revenge. She wanted them to pay. She wanted mom, dad and the whole community to regret what they had done to her. She yearned for the opportunity where her spirit form could stand nearby watching her dad and mom wailing in grief upon seeing their daughter sprawling dead on the ground. She liked the idea of hearing her dad crying and yelling “it’s my fault! Daughter I’m sorry! I shouldn’t have done that to you!”

Then Jurmayani jumped.

Once she’s airborne, everything suddenly changed. Because the devil had succeeded in performing the ‘final deception’, there’s no longer the need to whisper bad thoughts into Jurmayani’s mind. She’s already high aboveground and would die, and once a person commits suicide; he/she will obviously go to Hell. It’s the law.

Suddenly, she knew she made a terrible mistake. In that flash of moment, she realised that everything was not as bad as it seemed. She remembered that in the past, her dad had been angry about other things too, but in due time that anger subsided. She knew that all she had to do was to wait, because regardless of what she had done and how much she had destroyed them; they would always love her. A parent’s love has no boundaries. It’s the law.

While falling from the ledge of the building, she suddenly knew that regardless of what people might say or hurt her, these would pass by and heal. There would always be another man who would accept and love her. There would always be another day to start over because in the future, whatever happened “today” would always be remembered as just another “yesterday”. It’s the law.

So by the time she heard her skull cracked, she knew she had made a huge mistake. Later, she did witness her mom and dad wailing in sorrow. Unknown to them, their daughter was standing next to them also wailing in sorrow and regrets. Because my friend, Imam was able to see in his vision the entire incident which happened that day, simultaneously he had heard Jurmayani crying ““mom and dad, it’s my fault! I’m sorry! I shouldn’t have done that to you!”. In due course, the ghost was still crying in sorrow upon seeing what she had done to her parents.

It’s true what they say about people who committed suicide. They become restless and destine to commit suicide endlessly for eternity. For them, the regret and the sorrow will never end.

Sufiah Yusof had tried to commit suicide twice. Lucky for her she’s not dead yet. Lina Joy did not commit suicide but had abandoned the one true God - Allah. For both of these ladies, the devil’s deception continues. The devil will not stop until the day when he is certain there’s no way back for them. To die as apostate is as bad as committing suicide. There’s no heaven for apostate. That’s the law too.

(Note: I was told Sufiah Yusof has changed her life for the better. Good for her!)

Anyway, in Fatimah’s eyes, Robert was probably a God sent. Robert was a tall, decent looking Chinese man working as a manager in one of Pang’s family hotel. Fatimah was trying to find a job via for options. She managed to get an interview and that’s how Robert came to know her. Apparently, during the interview, she told Robert of her recent misfortunes and Robert took pity on her. Robert then employed her as his own personal assistant and the relationship bloomed from there on. Robert was very charming when it came to ladies and he knew how to play his role as a protector, father figure and boyfriend material to Fatimah. He paid for her rent, lent her a Myvi car, took her to dinner, listened to her problems and would tell her things that she wanted to hear from a man. A month later, she landed on his bed and he turned out to be her greatest-lover. By the time he nailed her with his.. err.. ‘equipment’, Fatimah had given 100%her body and soul to Robert.

Fatimah’s relationship with Robert was the beginning of a bad karma. Her mother who was visiting Fatimah at her house, found out about Fatimah’s sexual relationship with her boss upon the discovery of birth control pills and several condoms in her daughter’s bag. Fatimah was in the shower when her mother went through her mobile and read several indecent text/sms from Robert. An argument broke out between a mother and her love sick daughter. The ending was ugly when Fatimah wanted her mother out of her house by the next morning. The mother complied and that was the last she had seen her mother.

For me, Fatimah is the sort of person who always blames others for whatever misfortunes befall on her. I’ve known this kind of person because in my line of duty I meet them every single day. The way their mind work is whenever something good happens, the credit goes to them but when the shit happens – it’s someone else’s fault. The criminals I’ve met in Court have this mindset. It’s their parents’ fault that they became bad persons. It’s the bank’s fault that they committed fraud at work or took a bribe to pay for their debt. It’s the pusher’s fault they became junkies. It’s the police’s and prosecutor’s fault they were refused bail. It’s even their lawyer’s fault they lost the case and went to prison. It’s everyone’s fault except them.

In Fatimah’s letter, she blamed her former boyfriend, her parents and the entire Malay mindset for her conversion into Christianity. From her point of view, it’s entirely her boyfriend’s fault that she got knocked up and went for an abortion. It’s the university’s fault that she left the university (despite the fact that she had the option to repeat her semester). It was also her parents’ fault that she ended up being disowned.

The way she blamed everyone in her letter; I couldn’t help but to think of Anwar Ibrahim. He’s one of them you know. From his fall from grace as Deputy Prime Minister, to his imprisonment when he was found guilty for abusing his power, to the leaked videotape of him banging the baby-doll (chinese prostitute) – it’s all conspiracy theory he said. He even blamed others for the ‘misadventure’ of his own penis where he fucked his coffee boy’s ass. I bet if there was a tape of him singing “YMCA” song (that gay song made popular by a group called ‘The Village People”) while getting a blowjob from a shemale, he would blame that on some conspiracy theory too.

Amongst the content in the thumb drive, there was a letter from the university informing Fatimah when she was supposed to start her semester and a letter from the hotel indicating her the date of the job interview. Then there’s the certificate from the church issued after she was baptized. From this three documents I could figure out the timeline of her conversion. In conclusion, it merely took 2½ years for her to be an apostate. That’s not surprising, considering she was the kind of person who took merely 5 months from the day she met Robert to the day she kicked her own mother out.

I guess we can also say she’s a modern female version of “si Tanggang”.

In Malaysian folklore there is a legend about a guy called Tanggang who was accursed to stone after he insulted his own mother. For Fatimah, or Joyce as she would like to be called 2½ years later, she was entering her third trimester conceiving Robert’s child when the couple went to Jerejak island to spend some quality time together. A few days before their departure the couple went to see their favourite pastor – Miss Pang’s dad in his spare time - to reveal their intention to finally tie the knot. The senior Pang as a representative of the church blessed their intention but told the couple that the law prevented the marriage from being formalised because Fatimah was technically still a Muslim. But the marriage ceremony would proceed albeit informally and those attended were just the Pangs and a few other close acquaintances. After getting their blessing, the couple boarded a boat to Jerejak island for a lovely vacation a courtesy of the Pangs.

Three days later, Robert brought Fatimah (a.k.a Joyce) back to the church. She was unconscious, clearly ill, convulsing and there were foams in her mouth. She didn’t respond to any queries. The Pangs and their personal Doctor kept her under observation for 24 hours to see what could be wrong with her. Within that 24 hours, there were two occasions where her voice was heard. The first was around 11 pm when she screamed “Help me Mother! Help Me Father! I’m burning! I don’t want to die!”.

By 2 am, her condition worsened. She lost control over her bladder and the room was filled with a stench of urine and faeces. By 3 am, she suffered a massive seizure and the doctor could no longer risk losing his license and threatened to walk out if Fatimah was not sent to a hospital immediately. The Pangs then bribed a Malay taxi driver to rush Fatimah to the government hospital in-cognito. Miss Pang’s father told Ms. Pang to follow up the matter in the hospital in a pretext of representing Fatimah’s employer (by then Fatimah was in-charge of Mass Communication Department of the hotel).

In accordance to the script she was playing, Miss Pang only arrived at 9 am pretended as though she had just been informed of Fatimah’s admittance to the hospital. By this time, the doctors had decided they didn’t know what was killing Fatimah internally. She was barely conscious and was grasping for breath.

She was in such terrible condition that a young doctor - thinking that the dying patient was a Muslim - bent towards and told her to recite Shahada. (The shahada is the Muslim declaration of belief in the oneness of God (tawhid) and acceptance of Muhammad as God's prophet. The declaration reads “There is no god but God, and Muhammad is the messenger of God (in English)”).

Then, for the last time Fatimah opened her eyes and let her voice out again. She stared at the doctor with tears flowing from the corners of her eyes. The doctor heard her desperately tried to say something and removed the oxygen mask covering part of her face. To his sadness, he witnessed Fatimah trying desperately to say something which sounded like Shahada - “Asy.. Asy’ha.. Asy..” over and over again but couldn’t say it. Instead her tongue kept protruding out.

The entire medical team witnessed in horror the blackest tongue they’d ever seen in their lives.

Finally Fatimah’s lips twitched for the last time before she went quiet forever. After several days of suffering, she finally passed away with her eyes rolled up and her tongue still sticking out.

Outside the emergency room, Miss Pang had witnessed everything that had happened from a small window.


  1. as salam After Dark,

    terima kasih di atas perkongsian.

    isu pesakit HIV muslim tinggal di gereja juga pernah hangat disuatu waktu dahulu. disaat-saat akhir mereka sebelum dijemput izrail, hanya para 'jesuits' yang berada disisi, entah apa pula yg dibisikkan ke telinga saudara2 kita tu disaat mereka nazak kan...?! lepas tu jenazah dikebumikan di belakang gereja kerana ahli keluarga sudah tidak mahu menerima mereka. sounds familiar...?!

    tahniah kepada ustaz amin di atas kesungguhan membela pesakit2 HIV setelah dikeluarkan dari gereja:

    ~Universiti Kehidupan 85 – Mari !.. Semua wajib usahakan….

    ~ al-Ijabah 18 - Isu Muslim Di Gereja : My Side Story

    Dato' Khusrin, bekas boss MAIS pun pernah menjadi kontroversi bila dia dilantik menjadi SUK Selangor. Apa tak kecohnya para pengikut jesuits, sebab dialah orangnya yg membantu misi ustaz amin menyelamatkan pesakit HIV dari gereja tu.
    ~Al-Ijabah 13 – Isu Muslim Di Gereja, Rahsia MAIS terbongkar

    teruskan berkarya!

  2. Assalam bro,thanks for a very informative & enlightening exposure. I believe that is the ultimate christian missionaries modus operandi - they get the muslim ladies pregnant,then persuade the ladies that christian never discriminate ladies in that condition,unlike Islam.They then give the ladies a 'solution' ie by embracing christian, the sin will be forgiven by their pastor,simple eh. About the black tongue, I believe that the girl has been poisoned! As well as given 'holy water',nsuzubillah.

  3. Thanks for sharing that invaluable story.

    1. hai..ko tak nak komen lebih ke ? Kat blog lain mencarut habis..!!

  4. that is the missionary modus operandi-giving hope to the despair and the destitute....and converting them...I will share this article in my wall

  5. From what I've known as a muslim..being an apostate is the most unforgiven sin to be committed by a person to his faith according to Islam..the sin is tenfold damning if done by anyone trying to convert a muslim to another faith..even Allah has no mercy to them if they were not the christian pastors out not allow yourself to convert a will pay the price far greater than the apostate himself..

  6. Afterdark,

    Saya suka betoi baca ruangan ini, bg kes Sufiah..(sy x ada la menyokong tindakan dia) nk samakan dgn kes Fatimah x boleh jugak rasanya..sbb seingat saya Sufiah jd begitu sbb dia sendiri dicabuli bapa dia.

    1. so far, I have not came across any material stating that Sufiah was sexually abused by her father. Yes, during interview she blamed her father strict and vigorous method of upbringing, some which doesn't make sense such as slapping his children for menial reasons. Yes also, almost all her other siblings blamed their father ways of upbringing for Sufiah's downfall. However, as you can see, only Sufiah became prostitute. Whereas I agree that her father miserably failed to provide his children a joyful childhood, one have to take responsible for his/her choice when he/she became adult especially in situation where there's so many better options available to her. Sufiah's ex-husband said this during an interview (no mention about sexual abuse there) and I concurred with him 100%. I reckon everyone to read his take on Sufiah's choice in life. However, I do feel sorry for what she had to endure during childhood but in the afterlife I don't think God would accept her excuse if she don't repent.

  7. Enlighting. Thanks.

  8. is this 100 percent real or add by fiction. how do you know the details of fatima's death? just by looking at the documents or did miss pang witnessed the part when can't recite syahadah too?